Hi, everyone.
My name is Jackson Your Ecstasy, and I’m a relationship coach with over 25 years of experience.
I’d like to focus on my fellow men in this article, but if you’re a woman and your man has trouble lasting in bed, you should teach him what you are going to learn in this article. Many of my students who come to see me have sex problems, such as erectile dysfunction, sexual dysfunction, premature ejaculation, etc.
So, when it comes to people who have sexual issues, it’s always vital to rule out the medical side to guarantee that nothing is wrong with the body’s physiological system, and it’s crucial to highlight that I am not here to prescribe any drugs for you since I am not a fan of that.
I want to share deep secrets about what you can do if you are here to solve premature ejaculation.
The first thing I want to say is that you should try to see things from your partner’s point of view. You put pressure on yourself, which can lead to worry and tension, when you view sex as a performance or as something you “deliver” and that you need to do well.
Level 1A: Focus on the sexual encounter and not yourself; enjoy the sexual encounter and don’t pressure yourself.
When you are engaging in sexual activity with another person, avoid concentrating solely on yourself and viewing the experience as a performance. Instead, try to reframe your thinking so that you enjoy the experience as an interaction and a connection. See that the process is the destination and that you simply want to share a one-of-a-kind natural experience with the person.
Keep in mind that your reaction will have a huge influence on your spouse. If you’re furious, irritated, or frustrated with yourself, your spouse may feel detached from you and even uncomfortable. So the first piece of advice I have for anyone experiencing sexual difficulties is to think of the outcome as uncertain, like a football match.
Sex is not straight-forward; it’s interactive, so your disposition should be, “I don’t know how long our sex may last, but I’ll stay sexually connected with you and learn more about you.”
Level 1B: Stay out of your head
Being mentally preoccupied in certain common ways can be counterproductive to the goal of lasting sex.
Instead of telling yourself, “Don’t think,” and being harsh and demanding on yourself, you can bring it down to your body. As an example, you can do some pelvic floor squeezes and deep, controlled breathing as part of a routine that you keep track of as you go. You are basically redirecting your mind to doing something that can actually help the experience. This will increase your self-control.
Level 1C: Encourage yourself and flatter your partner
Implementing Levels 1A and 1B has proven to increase your sexual stamina over time; however, I advise you to do some positive self-talk as well. Appreciate every progress you make over time.
So for instance, a lot of my level 1 and level 2 students, when they get anxious because they feel they didn’t reach their specified expectations, talk to themselves in really harsh ways and then threaten themselves with words like “you better perform,” “you better do well,” and “you better not lose your grip.” This language can put you under a lot of pressure and hinder you from learning about yourself through observations that can only be made when you just connect and enjoy the sexual ride.
So instead of telling yourself, “You better not lose that direction” or “You better do well,” say things to yourself like, “I just want to have fun.” “I want to show this person how amazing, wonderful, and beautiful I think they are.” “I want us to enjoy each other’s bodies.”
By doing this during the sexual ride, you create an environment for sexual satisfaction.
On a day, for instance, when your eating and drinking habits cause you to not last long in bed, telling your wife that she is beautiful and very sweet is enough mental satisfaction for her while you keep working on yourself.
Of course, there are many more things I can offer privately, such as how I train and coach my people on how to tackle the age-old problem of premature ejaculation with attitudinal, psychological, and organic solutions.
However, I felt that this would be a good place to start talking, basically with (1A) focusing on the sexual encounter and not yourself; Enjoy the sexual encounter and don’t pressure yourself (1B) staying out of your head, and (1C) encourage yourself and flatter your partner.
If you wish to learn more through our Total Ejaculation Control program below and you would love additional personal coaching, then enroll and kindly forward your receipt to connect@yourecstasy.com so we can meticulously share this journey.
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